Privacy + terrible 90s haircut= face-obscuring profile picture!
Brian's 6-hr hiatus --> layout makeover! (this one is really more of a logic term: if Brian is gone for more than 6 hours, then Kelly will get completely bored and learn CSS)
But really, my new camera is pretty great. It's a Sony Cybershot and I got it on sale (woot!) at Best Buy. I don't know much about digital cameras, but my internet research led me to look for one with at least 10 megapixels, digital image stabilization (for reducing/eliminating blur in low lighting), and decent nighttime and landscape settings. This one has 12 megapixels and all of that other stuff, plus a whole bunch of features that I don't understand. I am slowly learning things about my camera, though, and I overall I do love it.
But I do have one reservation: the camera seems to be eerily concerned with smiling. Along with its usual auto, indoor, landscape, and nighttime modes, it also has a "smile mode" that boasts, "never miss a smile again!" It took me a while to figure out exactly what that meant--at first I just thought that it had shutter speed and focus settings that were somehow flattering to smiles, but then I learned that the camera actually has a smile sensor that detects when the subject is smiling. As soon as you crack a smile, it snaps a picture automatically. If you don't smile...well, then it will just have to wait until everyone is ready--the camera prevents you from manually taking a picture if no smile is detected.
If for some reason you should choose not to use smile mode and should, heaven forbid, take a picture of a smile-free face, rest assured--the camera has safeguards for arrogant mortals like you! Thanks to the "Happy Faces" retouching feature, even the most humorless face can now be made to express joy. All you have to do is select the feature from the menu, and it automatically recognizes and pulls up the corners of the mouth in question to create the illusion of a real, live smile. You can decide, on a scale from 1-5, how drastic to make the change. Below are some helpful illustrations:
Diagram 1.1: The Smile Scale
While I find my camera's smile-related features amusing, I can't help but suspect that they are the brainchildren of some angsty teenager's overbearing Aunt Maude.
My sister's camera phone has that feature too!! It's so funny! Though her phone can't insert smiles. I loved that :)
ReplyDeleteI actually think that the insert smile feature will come in handy when I take pictures of Brian.
ReplyDeleteThat is so bizarre. You should go to the zoo, and see what this feature does to the hippo.
ReplyDeleteHilarious and yet terrifying. I especially enjoyed the already-smiling altered grin. Your face just looks so unnatural.
ReplyDelete(On a side note, I am unhappy with this blog site. It refuses to allow me to double-space between sentences, which is how I learned to type--and how generations before me learned to type, my parents remark. I realize today's children [and a mind-boggling percentage of my own generation--given my personal instruction] weren't taught in this manner, but it doesn't give me any other option. Free will, whither art thou?)
hahahhahah i love that your camera can do that. also, how did you make the box at the top of your blog cool?
ReplyDelete